Bedroom Eyes Meaning: How to Use Them, Definition, & More

Rita

Last Updated: September 16, 2024

Dating Tips

What Are Bedroom Eyes?

Thinking of new ways to spice up your love life? Bedroom eyes might just be the right technique to add to your repertoire! This sultry, suggestive form of eye contact is a sure way to show your intentions without having to say a single word.

In this article, we’ll talk about what characteristics define bedroom eyes, how and when to use them, and what they can do to increase intimacy between you and a special someone!

History and Evolution

History-and-Evolution-of-bedroom-eyes.jpg

Humans have been trying out new ways to seduce one another since the dawn of our existence. And because eye contact is such a strong form of human connection, it’s likely that so-called “bedroom eyes” have been around for millennia.

But, something that really solidified the trend as we know it today was the Golden Age of Hollywood! During this time, starlets such as Marilyn Monroe, Rita Hayworth, and Lana Turner were able to exude sensuality on the screen without saying anything that wouldn’t pass censorship rules. In this context, the bedroom eyes meaning was clear without having to worry about offending viewers!

Nowadays, plenty of celebrities, from Megan Fox to Rihanna, are carrying on this long-standing tradition. You can even find prominent YouTubers, acting coaches, and influencers sharing their tips for bedroom eyes.

Recognizing the Look

The Golden Age of Hollywood was such an iconic era of sensuality that bedroom eyes hadn’t changed significantly since the 1940s. They typically contain some or all of the following features:

  • Slightly lowered eyelids
  • Relaxed muscles around the eyes and forehead
  • Steady gaze
  • Upturned chin
  • Slightly parted lips

All of these elements together create the effect of softness, openness, and intimacy.

The Psychology Behind the Gaze

The connection between eye contact and arousal is well-documented by science. According to brain scans conducted during sustained eye contact, this form of communication activates our autonomic nervous system and arousal centers. It can be responsible for everything from sweaty palms to a racing heart to shortness of breath.

Something that we’ll talk about more later on is that there’s a flip side to the psychology of bedroom eyes. After all, eye contact is a conversation, but that doesn’t mean that it's always a harmonious one! If there’s a mismatch in attraction between the people making eye contact, the person on the receiving end of bedroom eyes is likely to recoil from the sensation. And in general, men are more receptive to bedroom eyes than women, who often feel uncomfortable by it.

When and How to Use This Look in Dating

When-and-How-to-Use-bedroom-eyes-in-Dating.jpg

The fact of the matter is, if intimacy is developing between you and the person you’re attracted to, you may rely on bedroom eyes without even knowing that you’re doing it! That’s because bedroom eyes are our natural state when we’re ready for physical contact.

But, when and how should you bring out the bedroom eyes consciously? Here are a few moments to consider this form of eye contact:

  • In your selfies. If you and your crush have been messaging back and forth and things are getting flirtier and steamier, it might be time for you to showcase your modeling talents! Bedroom eyes in the photos you send to your special someone will make them eager to see you in person.
  • When you want to take things to the next level. If your date is going well, this is an opportune moment to bring out the bedroom eyes, meaning that you’re ready to take the night in a new direction.

Perfecting the Technique

Before introducing your bedroom eyes to your dating routine, it’s helpful to get some practice at home. This will feel a bit odd at first, but remember that a relaxed demeanor is key, so becoming comfortable in front of a mirror is a good first step. Here are some other tips:

  • Practice tensing and relaxing your eyebrows and your jaw. Playing around with what it feels like when your facial muscles are tense versus relaxed will give you the awareness you need to soften on command. You can think of these as warm-up exercises.
  • Notice how the light hits at different angles. When you push your chin slightly forward, it allows light to soften your features. And, the tilted angle will encourage your eyelids to naturally fall while you maintain your gaze.

Do’s and Don’ts

When incorporating bedroom eyes into your flirtations, there are a few do’s and don’ts to keep in mind:

  • Do: Take note of signs of interest and attraction. Someone who is interested in you will also use physical touch, flirting, and closeness to show that they’re attracted. Without these signals, you could pull out your bedroom eyes for someone who’s not receptive.
  • Don’t: Use the bedroom eyes too early. It’s best to wait to use your bedroom eyes when you’re ready for physical intimacy and you know there’s a connection between the two of you. Otherwise, it could send mixed signals.
  • Do: Remind yourself to stay relaxed. Bedroom eyes that aren’t relaxed will feel forced. So, make sure to lower your shoulders and soften your facial muscles.
  • Don’t: Feel like bedroom eyes are your only option. If making bedroom eyes doesn’t come naturally to you, don’t worry! There are plenty of other flirty options to signal that you’re ready to take the next step!

Impact on Relationships

It’s clear that bedroom eyes can be a good way to jumpstart physical intimacy with a new partner. But what about existing relationships? Should you try this technique with your long-term partner? According to dating experts, there are some potential benefits, such as:

  • Making your partner feel special.
  • Revitalizing intimacy by introducing novelty.
  • The ability to send signals that you’re ready to leave a public place to enjoy intimacy together.

If you’re looking to maintain intimacy as a part of your relationship, putting in the effort to perfect your bedroom eyes could be just the thing to reignite the spark!

Final Thoughts on the Technique

Now that you know the basics of bedroom eyes and how they can increase your intimacy with a crush or partner, it’s time to decide whether you’re ready to try it for yourself! Here are some final considerations for becoming a bedroom eye aficionado!

Subtle Signs to Look For

Using bedroom eyes on someone for the first time is vulnerable! You don’t know whether they’re going to pick up on your cues or be receptive to your advances. So, pay close attention to subtle signs of interest, such as:

  • Reciprocal eye contact.
  • Increased physical closeness.
  • Mirroring, such as relaxing their face and parting their lips.

Cultural Interpretations

One thing to keep in mind is that every culture has its own form of non-verbal communication to convey attraction and interest. In certain parts of Europe and East Asia, for instance, eye contact is considered to be rude and aggressive, and may put off a potential partner rather than bring them in.

So, if you try your bedroom eyes and don’t see any of those subtle signs covered in the previous section, consider changing your tactics.

Tips for Expressing Interest

Looking to make your interest known before trying out the bedroom eyes? Here are a few other techniques to show your feelings:

  • Make eye contact that isn’t necessarily bedroom eye-esque.
  • Use light physical touch like a tap on the shoulder or placing your hand on their forearm.
  • Smiling and laughing.

Avoiding Miscommunication

If you’re still worried that your bedroom eyes will be misunderstood, there is one more tactic that you can use which is pretty fool-proof: verbal communication! Telling your partner or crush how you feel is a non-ambiguous way to convey how you’re feeling inside. And it will ensure that you won’t be left wondering if your bedroom eyes weren’t strong enough to send the message.

Once your partner knows that you’re attracted to them, then they’ll be even more receptive to your bedroom eyes.